YOT Day 30 - Hope given by Larzipan

Tonight, unlike last night, I know exactly what I want to say.

Tonight, unlike last night, I am feeling the anger more than the sadness.  This is a good thing.  Anger I can deal with.  Anger, I know how to cope with.  Yes, anger and I get along quite well.  I am not an angry person (although some strangers that read some comments on Facebook will argue otherwise but screw them - they don't know me).  I am an extremely good-nature, fun-loving, happy person in general.  When I say anger and I get along, I mean to say that when I get angry I have NO qualms or problems expressing myself; sadness is much more difficult for me to express and work through.  Anger is also something I get over MUCH faster than anger.  So, yes, I like angry more than sad.

The anger tonight is directed at a few things - the details of which I will put into a rant.  This post, this is for what I am thankful for.  In a nutshell, I am angry at society.  We are can be self-absorbed, egotistical, blind, selfish bastards.  We close our eyes to things we don't like; we deny it, ignore it, pretend it is not there, or walk right by it.  Then there are the other people.  The internet is filled with posts like this one from the Huffington Post.  This was just the fist one I clicked on after a Google search for "random acts of kindness".  You see these all the time; people posting them on Pinterest and Facebook to "cheer up" everyone else.

I do not want to diminish the amazing acts these people do.  I love and appreciate all of the hearts.  The problem I have with it is that it should not be "news"; it should not make us say, "wow, that is amazing!"  While yes, it is amazing, it should not surprise us.  Why do we see this on the internet instead of EVER DAY of our lives in person?  I don't want to see it on the internet.  I want to see it with my own eyes.  Maybe I am guilty a bit too, I am not perfect.  I drive by a guy changing his tire in the rain, maybe I should help even if it is to hold an umbrella for him.  I always justify it...in my head.  He is fine, he obviously knows what he is doing.  Don't pull over, you don't know him; maybe he is a rapist.  

Don't get me wrong, I have done quite a lot of random kindness acts.  Many small, some bigger.  Some actually not even welcomed when I tried to help, believe it or not.  I consider my self a very nice and caring person.  I don't need to be on the internet to feel validated either.  But I could do more.  We could ALL do more.  So why don't we?  I am going to start doing more.  If we ALL start doing more, thing will change.  People will become less selfish, self-absorbed, and blind to those around them.  People will begin to see how things affect others.  THIS, my friends, is honestly what the world needs more of.

When someone needs help, we need to help.  If that means we buy food for a homeless man, we do it.  If it means we help an old lady across the street, we do it.  If that means we notice someone with Asperger's Disorder is getting aggressive we act instead of pushing them aside and hoping it will go away or that someone else will take care of it.  We live here together, we are all responsible for each other.

All of this mini-rant comes down to Lars going to sleep tonight (in his own bed thankyouverymuch).  While we were cuddling and talking he kept checking on me and complimenting me.  Are you ok Mommy?  Are you covered up good Mommy?  I love your hair, it is beautiful Mommy.  Do you need more blanket Mommy?  Do you have a pillow Mommy?

Tonight, this YOT Day 30 - I am forever thankful to Lars for giving me hope in our future.

I saw tonight, in this sweet, tired, caring three year-old that there is hope for us; hope for all of us.  So many children have the instinct to help and care,  It is born with us, inside of us.  Where does it go?  How do we lose it?  I blame it on parents for not nurturing it enough.  It is my goal as a parent, if I teach him nothing else, to ensure I teach him to be a kind, caring, unselfish person.  If we, as parents, focus more on that rather than pushing them to start school early, teaching them to get all AP classes, teaching them that you MUST be the best at everything, if we focus on raising GOOD people, the rest will fall into place.